This Girl at Home

I just turned 30 and I while I have been dreading it, I’m also trying to look forward to all the good things people insist occur when you turn 30. While I didn’t wake up on my birthday and feel some miraculous shift of power, I did come up with this list. Here are 10 things you need to do when you turn 30.

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1. Read a Book

This is something that I feel strongly about no matter what age you are, but turning 30 feels like a particularly good time to read something that inspires you. If you’re wanting to improve an area of your life or if you want to learn something new, this is a good time in your life to do it.

While I have always felt like turning 30 made me so old (eyeroll) the reality is that 30 is still so young in the big scheme of life. You still have so much time to be whoever you want to be. I personally am looking forward to making changes in my health and I’m wanting to read about women who built successful careers on their own.

Take a look at some of these books that I have read or plan to read!

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2. Make Amends or Let Go of Anger

Maybe someone wronged you or you’ve felt animosity over a certain situation. Perhaps it’s an accumulation of small things that has made you frustrated. If you’re having lingering feelings over something that you can truly forgive and get passed, do it.

At this age, we should have plenty of time left on this earth, but overall life is short. There’s a quote (and I’m honestly not sure who the originator is) that I love that talks about this. “Anger is the punishment we give ourselves for someone else’s mistake.”

When we allow ourselves to continuously feel anger towards someone, it perpetuates negative feelings. Ultimately, we are the only ones that truly suffer from these feelings. If it isn’t worth holding on to the grudge, let it go.

For other self-care strategies, read my blog here https://thisgirlathome.com/self-care-strategies/

When I say let it go, I’m not talking about truly harmful relationships. For those, there’s number 3.

3. Terminate Toxic Relationships

You’re turning 30, it’s time to say goodbye to people who wreak havoc on your life. Holding on to certain relationships even when they cause you emotional harm doesn’t make you a martyr, it makes you part of the problem.

You have to be willing to cut off relationships with people that don’t serve a positive purpose in your life.

Think of those people that whenever you see or speak to them, you leave feeling badly about yourself or just generally angry. Those are toxic relationships. It’s normal to have disagreements or to sometimes not get along with someone, but when you perpetually have bad interactions, it’s time to cut those relationships loose for your own well being.

There’s no need for a dramatic ending, either. You do not need to have a fight with someone to end a relationship. I don’t recommend ending relationships that way in general, but there’s no winning by arguing with a toxic person, anyway.

3. Go to Dinner By Yourself

Some of you are probably scratching your head on this one. This is really about spending time alone. Going out to dinner, or lunch, by yourself forces you to spend time alone in a different way than running errands. When you’re chronically engaged or preoccupied with what you’re doing, you’re not really taking time to be present with yourself.

This also means that when you do go to dinner, you can’t be glued to your phone. I will tell you that this may take a couple tries to get comfortable with doing. If you’re uncomfortable, your first instinct is going to be to say “uhhh actually can I get this to go?” You also might cling to your cell phone like it’s your life line.

Try your hardest to be present with yourself. It will get easier. Watch people, think about your day, and really enjoy your food. The point is to be extremely comfortable and confident being alone. You’ll find this confidence carries over into other areas of your life.

This is important too for my next point.

4. Don’t Date Someone Just Because

Sometimes when we get closer to 30, or turn 30, a panic sets in on us. We feel pressure to get married or start a family. Suddenly you might be reconsidering going on a date with that guy that you’ve already turned down twice. Don’t!

Do not sacrifice the quality of a relationship because of pressure you are feeling. This is something that I feel really fortunate that I have nearly always practiced. No amount of societal, or family pressure, is worth being with someone you don’t genuinely want to be dating.

You may want to be in a relationship badly, but I promise that going out with someone just to have a relationship isn’t going to really make you feel fulfilled. Part of getting older is being confident in who you are and what you want. Do. Not. Settle.

5. Work on Your Finances

Ew, bills. I get it. But as you get older, chances are you’re going to need a loan at some point. This means that your credit is going to need to be in at least decent shape to get approved. You do not want to have to put your life on hold because you didn’t get your credit under control earlier.

My goal is to buy a house next year, so I’ve been working on getting my credit score up the last year and a half so that when I’m ready, I can get approved for a loan.

While you’re at it, you should also start a savings account if you don’t already have one. I know that times are tough, and most people don’t have spare money laying around that they can put into savings. Even if you find a way to put the smallest amount aside each month, it will begin to add up in time.

You will be grateful you did it.

6. Get Your Health in Check

A number of people have told me that your body starts to change in your 30’s and it becomes harder to lose weight. I’ve heard that turning 40 it gets even worse. While I am not a physician and nothing that I say should be taken as medical advice, I do personally believe that you should check in with your doctor.

Getting a physical, or getting any concerns, you have checked out could make a huge difference in your life.

If losing weight is something you want to work on, I have consistently heard that it’s the sooner the better. Don’t keep putting it off! Talk to your doctor about your health.

And put down those wings, girl!

7. Find Your Best Look

Style is something that is completely personal to the individual, but I believe 30 is a good year to evaluate your personal style. Maybe you’ve had the same bangs since you were 12. Maybe you haven’t bought a new sweater in a decade. It’s time to evaluate if how you’re presenting yourself is how you really want to present to the world.

This is not a mid-life crisis. I’m not telling you to get a red mohawk and drain your savings to buy a sports car. I’m simply saying take a good look in the mirror and ask yourself what you could change that would make you feel good about yourself.

I think 30 is actually an awesome age for style because you’re young enough to still wear a lot of trends, but old enough for more sophisticated looks. Taking trends and making them more grown up and classy is awesome!

8. Drop a Bad Habit

The term bad habit could mean a lot of things. Some are more obviously counterproductive to your health, like smoking, for example. Others, like internally talking down to yourself, might not be as noticeable.

Whatever your bad habit is, it’s time to let it go. Simply saying you’re going to stop it isn’t enough. Bad habits often come from years of conditioned behavior so quitting a bad habit will likely take some work. You need to make an actual plan for yourself to stop the behavior.

Fortunately for us, we have the internet at our fingertips so there is likely mounds of information to help you stop whatever behavior you’re trying to combat. It may take time, but don’t give up!

9. Get Yourself Organized

Listen, we all have days where we can’t get it together and we feel a bit crazy. I get it. But at this point in your life, it isn’t cute to be unorganized and a hot mess all the time. Often times your disorganization impacts others or is noticed by others.

Think about it this way. When you’re not organized you can end up being late all the time, you can lose things, and you can be unprepared. None of those qualities are charming, and quite frankly, they’re annoying and rude.

Again, if you need help with a plan to get organized, Google it. Get yourself a calendar or a planner. Budget an extra 30 minutes if you’re constantly late. Make a to-do list so you don’t forget things. Set a reminder in your phone.

Others will appreciate these better habits and you’ll feel better too.

10. Invest in Skin Care

Your skin should be a top priority not just for physical appearance, but for safety too. You need to wear sunscreen all the freaking time. Period. This can help prevent not just lines and sun spots, but also potentially skin cancer.

You probably already know your skin type, but if you don’t, there’s plenty of information online to help you determine it. Once you have your skin type, you can get skin care recommendations based on your type, and problem area if you have any.

You can always get recommendations from consultants in stores, but I personally love to read reviews. There’s nothing compared to real people telling you the straight truth about whether something works or not. They’re also not getting a commission when you give their name at the register.

Honestly, I think turning 30 sounds like it might be awesome, and I’m looking forward to seeing what it brings. Comment below and tell me if there is something else you HAVE to do when you turn 30!